"those rainy days they ain't so bad when your the king, the king they wanna be"

Recently, I attended the climatic show of a Montreal "battle of the unsigned bands". This competition started at 32 bands and was down to a final four on this night. The winner took home all the excess equipment on stage, an appearance on MuchMusic and 40hrs of free studio time. Disappointingly, in coveting the prize, some groups brought trash to accompany their garbage performance (confetti, balloons, beach balls). Hence, 'Prototype A' (a 'finger eleven' carbon copy) took it home over a much more deserved, talented and unique piece named 'Scarlet Stone' (who sadly had less friends and family in attendance). Backstage, I stated this opinion to the subdued runners up and overheard them sarcastically mutter they needed to invest in confetti. Still steaming and wanting to further express my frustration with live music, I bring you my top pet peeves related to music performances.

awards by fan base
we've seen what poor results the majority vote brings with the US President! I suggest digging deeper, finding better methods of evaluating talent. everyone knows the winner in a popularity contest. whats more intriguing is finding the most amazing musicians with poor business and marketing skills.

gimmicks
'the flaming lips' have pioneered them in modern day music, but all other bands should take a step back, respect this monopolization, and find their own niche; leave the bubble walking to Wayne Coyne.



hecklers/song requests
After recently being enlightened on the most famous heckle of all time in music... someone belting out "Judas" at a gig in Manchester in 1964; aimed at Bob Dylan, the name calling was referring to him being a traitor for 'plugging in', switching from acoustic to electric (big deal at the time)...I've elected to display the wittiest artist replies I've overheard, directed at individuals who annoyingly chose song breaks to yell out unnecessary selfish requests.

Ryan Adams: "wow, that's great you know, i think that's really great that you wanna hear that song, and I'm not sure how well you know how this works, but ah, about 30 minutes before we come out here, me and the band sit down and write out this list of songs we're gonna play for the night and if you don't mind, I think we'll just stick to that"

Win Butler (arcade fire): "It's so cool people remember our song titles."

Neil Young: "somebody do me a favour and knock that guy out"



Music and Politics don't mix
Alice Cooper said "artists opinions on politics shouldn't matter". Shut up Alice. It's for this reason your opinion no longer matters. Step aside, your old and the times they are a changin'. Musicians are citizens just like everyone else and they earned their stage, hence its their blank page, let them write as they like. It's called promotion for more than your own pocket.



artist trashing/the marketing ploy
Though my top band (oasis) is most famous for it, at least they have weight to back it up. I'm targeting those who show a bold face, but than don't have merit to put money where their mouth is. More bluntly, uttering worthless comments about a proven band to garner publicity on their name. In the end words amount to garbage, the music speaks volumes.